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Wednesday, May 10, 2023

Mister B-I-G Billhooks

 

What a lot of Billhooks! Left to right standing Steve Blease, Ben Mallet, Andy Callan, James Beeching, Lloyd Lewis, Andy Millburn, Nigel Davie, Steve Wood, Elliot Davie, George Cowie. Taking the knee Mark Taylor, Mike Peters, Colin Bright

The inaugural Mister B-I-G Billhooks tournament, held at Bristol Independent Gaming on 6th May, was a happy meeting of likeminded Billhookers.

  The day was marked by a cheerful buzz of witty banter and good-natured ribaldry as a dozen gnarly gamers battled for the title of Mister B-I-G Billhooks and the magnificent trophy created for the occasion by B-I-G’s own Jim Harding.

Players fought for the House of Lancaster or the House of York (or Burgundy!) in the tradition of the well-established Derby derby, the Billhooks BASH, but were also awarded points for their performance in each battle. A victory scored three points and one point was awarded for each point of leader that was killed or routed from the field, hopefully encouraging the kind of head hunting that the Wars of the Roses was notorious for. The number of coins taken was also recorded to use as a tie breaker if required.

In Their Own Words… Each general had a Battle Report Sheet for each battle and I asked them to record any highlights as well as the results of the game…

This was the first tournament I have organised and run and although there were some challenges it all went smoothly thanks to BIG Jim’s experience and the good-natured enthusiasm of the players

It was hard to be everywhere at once but I did my best to follow as many games as I could while being on hand for rules queries. Several games caught my interest.

  Steve Wood’s Yorkists smashed James Beeching’s Lancastrian army with “Audleys‘s ward being completely destroyed in the first turn” -James, the game ended in the second turn!

Billhooks newcomer Nigel Davie gave the games author Andy Callan a run for his money, Mr C stealing a “Yorkist victory by the skin of my teeth with both armies down to nought coins!”

Steve Blease fielded a magnificent Burgundian army with three squadrons of knights and was able to flank Lloyd Lewis’s Lancastrians, the Burgundians eventually claiming victory in what became a very hard-fought game. 

Ben Mallet and Elliot Davey were the youngest players at the tourney, Steve B’s Knight’s were older than the pair of them combined! They met in the first round. Ben’s Yorkist Army suffered a ”shock loss!” 

“Both cavalry went for the flanks, Yorkist cavalry ended the Lancastrian artillery, but then went one unit too far and ended up routing from Levy troops” Ben reported



Ben continues “Edward advanced with his veterans menacing the Lancastrian right flank. Lancastrian Levies took massive casualties, then Edward charged a Bill/Bow unit.” Presumably not successfully as “Edward ran away pissing his pants”

  Reads like the “Arrivale”   doesn’t it…

  After the first Round York have four victories to Lancaster’s two


Elliots Lancastrians.










In the Mister B-I-G Billhooks contest…Steve Wood has seven points, Steve Blease has six, George, Elliot and both Andy’s have five points and Lloyd has four points. No one else has scored.



Lunch-chilli, and the best painted army competition was next and Mark Taylor was voted as the worthy winner just pipping Steve Blease’ magnificent Burgundians. Mark takes home a handy pop together dice tray uniquely printed with the Mister B-I-G Billhooks logo

The Second Round

  The Battle of the Two Steve’s was over in an eye blink. Steve Blease’ CiC, Charles the Bold, was a little too bold and isolated from his men for he was shot to pieces by the Great Gonne, crossbows and archery in the first turn. 

Steve Blease brought his rather glorious Citadel knights out of retirement for this tourney, they are forty years old. “As soon as I saw the Billhooks Deluxe cover, I wanted to recreate it!” said Steve




Nigel Davie Lancaster v York Andy Millburn  produced some interesting comments from a game that swung from total victory to complete defeat for the Yorkists. “Let us erase this game from memory “ was crossed out by Nigel and replaced with “How the worm turns! History is written by the victors..a Lancaster …a Lancaster!”

  Andy ”Lucky win for Nigel!”

Andy Callan scraped “a narrow Yorkist victory after the treacherous defection of a company of his bowmen!” against a rather amused Elliot Davey!









After the second round Lancaster have evened the Team Score to six games each.

Steve Wood is leading the race to the crown with 12points, Andy Callan hot on his heels with 10 points, Lloyd 9 points, Elliot 8, Steve Blease and Andy 6, George, Ben, Nigel all on 5, Mark 4, Colin 3 and trailing yet to score James.



Mark Taylor























and his dice!

Round the Third


Only two players, Andy Callan, and Steve Wood, had won both of their games and by the luck of the draw they met in the third round in what would be a B-I-G Billhooks King o’the Day final!

 Old friends Mark Taylor and James Beeching played their third game. “Lancastrian Victory! Richard III dead!” proclaimed the report by James. Well, I am sure that Coventry Council at least are pleased to hear it, could be awkward otherwise.

Nigel’s Lancastrians suffered another defeat this time at the hands of George’s Yorkists “Pesky Yorkists beat us at the last!”

Steve Blease made a late comeback beating Elliot’s Lancastrian Army increasing his score to 14 points and making him a possible contender

The two old friends set out their forces.  “There’s no game of Billhooks so hard fought as one between two old regular adversaries” Cicero

“All games of Billhooks come down to this!” Pliny the elder

“A six…a six …my Kingdom of the Day for a six!” Mark Taylor

Over to Steve Woods for an exciting, blow-by-blow account “My day at the BIG Billhooks event held in Bristol came to an exciting climax with a playoff against Andy Callan. I had had a relatively smooth ride to the last game winning my two previous games in very quick time, mainly due to some lucky card draws, fantastic dice rolls and some inexperienced deployment by my opponents. The final game was going to be a bit tougher as both Andy and myself were determined to win and be crowned ‘Biggest Bill Hooks’ in Bristol!

Of course, Andy and myself have played each other many times before, right from the very start of play testing almost four or more years ago! It was going to be a tight battle!

Deployment was a cagey affair. Lord Hotspur, was on the right wing, supported by Sir Danny Rose and the Light Cavalry, Sir Eric Diehard deployed to the left and unusually for me, I placed both my Artillery and Skirmishers (Gunsmen and Crossbows) in the centre.

Facing me, Andy had placed his skirmishers on each wing. Andy had decided to use Kern for one of his skirmisher units – no doubt intent on giving me a taste of my own medicine! His Light Cavalry (Sgt Buttercross) were deployed in the centre and Lord Callan faced Lord Hotspur, with Captain Bingham facing Diehard.

The game opened with the manoeuvre phase. I moved Sir Diehards block forwards, only for Andy to reply by firing his cannon to open proceedings. The good news was that his cannon immediately blew up much to my amusement!

Turn one saw Andy’s Kern advancing down my Right flank, trying to turn Sir Diehard; and his cavalry pushing from the centre, threatening Diehards other flank. I replied with a Cavalry move down the left flank, threatening his skirmishers and the flank of his Commanders ward.

By turn two, both of our light cavalry had been put to flight, inflicting minimal casualties in the melee’s, and causing us both to lose two morale tokens. However, a somewhat reduced unit of Kern had got around to the rear of Sir Diehard and as a result of the first exchange of arrows, Lord Hotspur and Sir Diehard were taking casualties. Hotspur was worried!

In turn Three, Lord Callan had advanced within bow range of Lord Hotspur’s command and was able to unleash an Arrow storm. Despite throwing 34 dice Lord Callans bowmen only managed two more casualties! Sir Diehard ignored the Irish Kern and focused on the threat posed by Captain Bingham, beginning to reduce the effectiveness of the opposing ward with accurate arrow fire. The Irish kern, looking for an easy victory charged my Gun, only to be beaten off by the Artillery men – the kern skulked off for a quiet Guinness! Even better, Hotspur was able to reply with his bowmen, mauling Lord Callan’s reserve unit causing it to become daunted - one more morale point to me.

Turn four and Lord Hotspur was gradually edging the Arrow exchange. Despite losing a unit of archers to a rout (two morale tokens to Andy!), the rest of Hotspurs wing was holding steady and now outnumbered Lord Callans unit. On the right, Sir Eric Diehard had caused another archer unit to become daunted (one more coin to me!) and had superior numbers and more arrows to loose!

Turn five and it was four morale tokens each, meaning that we had just three tokens each left in the pot. However, Lord Hotspur had shaken off any doubts of a loss, Outnumbering Lord Callan on the battlefield, and with two of Lord Callans units Daunted, it was just a matter of time before they broke!

Captain Buttercross sent his billmen into a last desperate charge before they were cut down by Diehards arrows, the canon, now ready for action and my last band of skirmishers. With 11 billmen facing Diehards 12 and supporting archers it was 13 dice vs 17 dice. Against the odds, Diehard lost the melee by one casualty – anything but a four and the melee would continue, surely Diehard’s superior numbers would triumph!

Well, no actually, he threw a 3 and routed, snatching defeat from the jaws of victory – 4 morale token were required, only three were available. Much to Lord Callans relief, this bold manoeuvre had won the game Victory for Lord Callan! Well done Andy!

What a game! We were both exhausted by the twists and turns of fortune. It was time for a beer….”

Andy Callan “Narrow tactical win after cagey manoeuvres by two old hands”


We Crown’d a King!

Andy was a worthy winner, he usually has the role of Umpire and Rules Guru so it must have been a pleasure for him to just relax and play the game.

  The final scores were Andy Callan 17 points, the two Steves tied second place with 14 points, Andy Milburn 13 points, George and Colin score 12 each, Lloyd and Mark 9, Elliot 8, Nigel 7, Ben 5 and James is waiting for the next one to really make his mark.


Everyone is a Winner

B-I-G is a great venue. We had the place to ourselves for the day with bacon butties for those who wanted them, hot drinks and snacks and we all enjoyed a hearty lunch of chilli.


No one went away empty handed thanks to the Mister B-I-G Billhooks goody bag which contained a copy of Wargames Illustrated WI 424, the exclusive, limited edition, only available at Mister  B-I-G Billhooks, Special Event Card “Deserters” and a resin English 100 Year War archer from the printer of Jim Harding.

   B-I-G Jim enjoyed it so much he immediately announced a rematch, Mister 2 B-I-G Billhooks, which will be held on Saturday 28th October!

What a great way to spend the day and after all...there was nothing on the telly!





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